RBOC--start of the year, start of the term

• My afternoon class is always turned up to 10. It's a rare semester when that class is sedate or quiet. Last semester, a group of them yelled my name and commented on my outfit each day when I came into the room. This term, they mostly stared at me like they were bored. Second week of class and I've already had to give the evil eye/you're pissing me off look to a student taking out her phone. Questions hang in the air like a bad smell. I may have to start eating chocolate during class before it's over with.
• I've exhausted most of the television series I wanted to watch on Netflix. That makes me sad. Binge-watching Netflix has become quite dear to me. I started Twin Peaks, since I didn't watch it originally. I don't know if it's worth continuing. We'll see.
• The department somehow ended up with several first year students who don't have a composition course to enroll in. All of the sections are full, so new ones have to be created. But a number of students came begging to be overloaded into my sections. They balked at the idea of finding a class taught by a different instructor. A couple said that the material I chose for my classes was right up their ally. That made me feel really good, especially since I often feel like the work I do in the classroom means nothing to anyone but me. Of course, I still sent them out of my office to find another class.
• The pastor of the church we attend asked the membership to fast this month. Skipping meals gives headaches, so I was going to fast from sugar. Then I made a cup of hot tea and the honey was coming out too slowly. So I used sugar. Then I decided to fast from candy only. That's probably not really what the pastor had in mind, and it's probably rather pathetic, but it's the best I can do. And since there people keep leaving mini-chocolate candies on the lobby desk, it's not a small thing to resist.

Top Ten--2011

Top Ten Awesome Things about 2011:

1. The Crisis has made some progress in the right direction. And it's not nearly as bad as it could be.
2. Huge strides in my quest to get more publications under my belt.
3. My job is going really well, mostly, and I have opportunities that would probably not otherwise be available to me.
4. The Hubby and I have figured out a date-nigh/babysitting exchange with another family that has been really valuable.
5. The Babydoll and The Baby Boy are doing quite well in school and in extra-curricular activities.
6. Friends who had been wanting a baby for nearly five years, and who had a stillborn in the process, welcomed their beautiful, healthy son. A number of other friends also welcomed healthy babies into their families.
7. Finally had my bridal portrait framed, three years after I actually posed for it, and 10 years after I actually got married. (Of course, The Hubby cracked the glass in the process of giving it to me for Christmas, but, oh well.)
8. My hair is doing great. I'm learning to handle it in its unrelaxed state and I've had a very useful shift in my definitions of beauty. I feel sassy and I learned to swim (kind of)!
9. Regarding another crisis with family friends, one unrelated to the major crisis in my life, another year has passed that moves them closer to a resolution of a very bad thing.
10. The little world in my house is pretty good; my children are mostly unaffected by the horrible things that I know are going on and they are, I think, really and truly happy children who express their love for us and each other; my husband still loves me and I still love him. And I like him a lot of the time, too.

*And here's a bonus: I finished the awesome list much more quickly than the suck list.

Top Ten Sucktastic Things about 2011:

1. The Crisis will not freaking go away. It gets better, then randomly and unpredictably gets worse. And there's so little I can do about it.
2. The Crisis insists on sprouting branches, most of which I can barely do anything about.
3. We lost an elder in our family.
4. Still have friends who haven't yet been able to realize their dream of becoming parents.
5. Still not on anybody's tenure track.
6. Still having migraines, despite efforts to change my diet (although that's helped some) and I might need to switch medications again.
7. Something that I wanted to happen for a long time fell into my lap and then was snatched away. It still has not materialized in a successful way.
8. My faith is . . . challenged. And confused. But that might just be this week.
9. I missed a perfectly free Stevie Wonder appearance because I was at a conference.
10. Failed goals.

Seriously?

So, I decided to be all industrious and hard-working today. I started working on my syllabi and planning for classes. I listed all of the class dates and started filling them in with assignments and class work. Then I realized--oh. my. goodness.--these dates start next flipping week! What in the world?! Here I was thinking that I had two more full weeks and that I was really on top of things by starting now. Instead, I suck because I don't even have some of the books that I need to list readings on the syllabus. And you know what else sucks like a Hoover? It's what-the-heck? degrees outside and now I'm going to have to drag my behind all the way to campus as if I'm not still on vacation. This is not cool at all.

Thankful Thursday

I am thankful that 2009 is (almost) over.

I am thankful that 2009 left me and my family only a little bruised instead of done for.

I am thankful that 2010 will bring joy, peace, health, and prosperity.

Happy New Year!

New Year, New Goals

As this new year has dawned, all the morning shows have talked about creating "a new you." People make resolutions and even you, SM, have set forth some aspirations to be better during the coming year. I try not to make resolutions because like many people, I rarely keep them. Instead, I try to make goals. But really, isn't a rose by any other name just as sweet? Whatever, I will still set forth some more goals.

Several years ago, a friend of mine challenged me to list 101 experiences that I wanted to have in my lifetime. Regardless of feasibility, likelihood, money, limitation, etc., I was to write out 101 experiences. It's sad, I know, that to this day, I am only able to list 31 things! Well, you could look at it from the perspective that I don't think very imaginatively (which is sad) or that for the most part, I do what I want to do without having the chance to list it. (Okay, probably the truth leans more toward the former.) This year, I will try to accomplish some of the things on my list. That is my goal. And maybe to add more experiences to the list.

The experiences on my list are not necessarily that big or that hard to do, but sometimes life gets in the way (of living--isn't that ironic) or I forget to try to do them. For instance, I would like to taste marzipan. See, not a big deal and readily available at Christmas time. But between grading papers at the end of the Fall semester, squeezing in time to shop for gifts, and visiting family, I have forgotten to buy some time and time again. Another experience I want to have is to participate in a scavenger hunt. These do not present themselves everyday. However, can you believe that there was one at Biblebelt Unviversity just last semester?!? I was all ready to sign up, but they said only teams could sign up and I didn't have a team. Also, I had something come up and I had to do it that same afternoon, so even if I had signed up, I would have had to bail on it.

There are some items that require a little more effort and a little more money that I have not accomplished, too. For instance, I'd like to go to Venice. On top of time and money being obstacles, DH is not interested in going in the least. But I am going to get to Venice one day. And Paris, France, too!

For this year, I will try to accomplish the following goals:

• come up with more experiences I would like to have
• have a glamorous makeover
• be a mother
• visit the Washington Monument
• have a book published
• taste a souffle

Some are small goals, some are a little loftier. Here's hoping this year brings me and everyone the accomplishment of all goals and resolutions!

What's new?

So, as the new year rolled in I revisited a list that I began on my 30th birthday. It's a list of the things I hope my life will bring me. Places I want to go. Experiences I want to have. As soon as I wrote the list, one of the items happened right away. So, now I write down everything I can think of. Obviously, writing it down makes it come true, right?

Looking at that list again, I'm setting out on this year with an openness that I don't usually have. Well, I'll try. I want to be comfortable with the discomfort of not knowing, not understanding, being unsure. Leaping. The net will appear. Last year was filled with so many unexplained tragedies that I wanted to . . . I don't know, say screw it. But there were wonderful, unexpected open doors, too. So, I'm going to believe that happiness will surround me and prevail all over the world. And that we'll survive and sustain when it doesn't.

In the meantime, I'll look for ways to make my list happen. And thanks, TD, for bringing me one item on the list. :)